So,
With the 3-week mark behind me my perspective on life after digital suicide is becoming more and more clear to me. And it's no walk in the park. The realisation has sunk in that digital suicide basically means doing ALL of your social interaction the hard, direct way. Also, it was just one of the circumstances reinforcing my social isolation. I'm still struggling to 'get real' and reach out to people in order to get more out of my social life. No one action is decisive in this process. It's a long, slow march to social enlightenment and no single step is more significant than the other.
Dealing with people solely on a face-to-face or via 'direct media' (eq. phone, e-mail) means you don't talk to people unless you have something to say specifically to them. Facebook and Twitter might give a lot of people a window to spill nonsense into the digital realm, for a lot of others (myself included) it meant sharing what is on one's mind in a quick and easy matter. And while I certainly don't want to be engulfed within this realm the way I was before, in my absence the merits of social media have also become more clear to me.
On another note, I may have underestimated the actual connection these social media have to real life. While I may have opted out of using social media, most musicians are forced to work with it because it is the only way to reach out to their audience across the globe. Being forced to reconsider what seemed like a done deal just a few weeks ago because of my work is very frustrating. If I'm to involve myself in this industry beyond this point, I will have to either draw the line (and probably get less jobs) or meet the terms of my employers when it comes to social media. The fact that it took less than a month for an employer to request my presence in the social media sphere as it was deemed 'essential to my assignment', is proof that I'm not overstating the issue here.
But shouldn't we have a choice? Isn't the decision to pursue a presence in social media a personal one? I feel very strongly that I don't want it to be something that is dictated to me in my life. It almost seems as if we are, unwittingly, conforming to a system that discriminates those who choose not to be part of it. Are we aware that behind this harmless blue-and-white logo there is something very totalitarian at play here? One that leeches on people's ego, ambition and greed?
On the other hand, it's kind of nice that after years of building up my social network I'm finally able to harvest some income from my hard labour. In the current economy one can't really be idealist about the way one makes his money. The point is that to my mind, I'm a better employee without the social media thing. That counts for something, right?
So what am I to do? Forced into reconsidering my priorities while still being hell-bent on completing this little suicide mission is giving me a headache. Meanwhile, there are so many things in life that are more important, more worthy of my time and headspace.
If only there was a way of controlling social media without them controlling you... I've spoken to more than a few people about the possibilities of this, and everybody agrees there must be a way... they just don't know what it is. My own insights tell me that if you are able to maintain a strong frame in which to fit your own social media activities, with very clear goals you want to achieve and a very clear perspective on what is 'out of bounds', one's presence could be streamlined into something beneficial. It' very much like giving a rusty needle to a recovering heroin addict to play around with though...
My head hurts.
vrijdag 26 juli 2013
woensdag 17 juli 2013
Post Facebook Contemplation
So,
It's been 2 weeks since I decided to give up on social media. I deleted my Facebook (ca. 1850 friends) and Twitter (900+ followers) in an attempt to clean up my life and especially the way I spend my time. I needed to get out of the house more, get 'real' with my social contacts and focus on the many challenges still facing me in the next few months. I wasn't doing well, my focus was all over the place and taking in a couple-hundred updates every day certainly usurps a lot of your brain. On top of that, my girlfriend had been complaining about lack of attention. I needed to make a move. And I did.
Throwing my carefully crafted social network out with the bath water may seem like an overstatement, and perhaps even a stupid idea considering most of my work has been in communication. But I'm trying to change some of my patterns, and involving myself in this digital community has been a persistent distraction for a long time now.
At first, I felt completely relieved having 'done the deed' (someone get me a cigarette). A burden was lifted from my shoulders and my girlfriend was quite pleased as well. Jasper 1 - Social Media 0. The next few days I was more focused, things were getting done... I was on top of the world. But as with all nasty habits, they don't take their defeat graciously. Up to now, I've caught myself randomly surfing to the facebook or twitter to be met with an empty login portal. It's like the routine to check those sites is completely imbedded in my subconscious. Creepy. Luckily I snap out if it easily, so there's no real risk of undoing all my work.1 But there's also a more serious contention to consider: the loss of an audience. As a (self-proclaimed) music journalist I've used social media to keep informed on what people are doing, to stay in touch with 'the scene' and to get the word out on my published articles as well as simply sharing tidbits with my audience.
While I haven't really found myself at a disadvantage when it comes to getting informed and I've made it a point to focus on my real-life interactions, I've essentially lost the connection with my audience. No more easy ways of sharing music and anecdotes, thoughts and jokes with a group of 'like' minded individuals. 2 I didn't anticipate this would be such a hard pill to swallow, considering that I wasn't sharing that many updates in the weeks leading up to my 'digital suicide'. But there's no disputing the fact that I'm suffering at the moment. Apparently, I don't write solely for my own enjoyment. Don't get me wrong: I'm no stranger to the fact that social media is a huge catalyst for a person's ego. And mine is jonesing for some thumbs up from the digital crowd.
It's utterly disappointing. Off course, I'm not caving in, but the fact that I'm really actually suffering from Facebook-withdrawal... what a silly thing! Not to mention the grave implications this puts on Facebook. More than ever, I see the danger of getting trapped inside social media's web. Thankfully, it has only added to my perseverance.
So what's the conclusion thus far?
1. I need to face my own ego, obviously. I need to be able to create meaning in what I do outside of 'the other'.
2. I need to be more creative when it comes to social interactions. In the end, real-life interactions will always trump whatever social media will throw at you, despite the extra effort.
3. I need to keep my long-term goals in mind. Get ahead with my education; spend more quality time with the missus; improve relationships with the people you hold dearest; be a more productive person in general. That's what I'm out to achieve. Maintenance of aim is always a difficult thing, but achieving one's goals is the ultimate pay off; only then can one decide the worth of one's sacrifices.
1 I should point out here that Facebook keeps your profile on file indefinitely, while Twitter erases your profile after four weeks. Especially in the case of FB, it's devious. Your 'old social life' is only a mouseclick away. That's how to get you.
2 In case you were wondering: Yes, I'm coining that.
It's been 2 weeks since I decided to give up on social media. I deleted my Facebook (ca. 1850 friends) and Twitter (900+ followers) in an attempt to clean up my life and especially the way I spend my time. I needed to get out of the house more, get 'real' with my social contacts and focus on the many challenges still facing me in the next few months. I wasn't doing well, my focus was all over the place and taking in a couple-hundred updates every day certainly usurps a lot of your brain. On top of that, my girlfriend had been complaining about lack of attention. I needed to make a move. And I did.
Throwing my carefully crafted social network out with the bath water may seem like an overstatement, and perhaps even a stupid idea considering most of my work has been in communication. But I'm trying to change some of my patterns, and involving myself in this digital community has been a persistent distraction for a long time now.
At first, I felt completely relieved having 'done the deed' (someone get me a cigarette). A burden was lifted from my shoulders and my girlfriend was quite pleased as well. Jasper 1 - Social Media 0. The next few days I was more focused, things were getting done... I was on top of the world. But as with all nasty habits, they don't take their defeat graciously. Up to now, I've caught myself randomly surfing to the facebook or twitter to be met with an empty login portal. It's like the routine to check those sites is completely imbedded in my subconscious. Creepy. Luckily I snap out if it easily, so there's no real risk of undoing all my work.1 But there's also a more serious contention to consider: the loss of an audience. As a (self-proclaimed) music journalist I've used social media to keep informed on what people are doing, to stay in touch with 'the scene' and to get the word out on my published articles as well as simply sharing tidbits with my audience.
While I haven't really found myself at a disadvantage when it comes to getting informed and I've made it a point to focus on my real-life interactions, I've essentially lost the connection with my audience. No more easy ways of sharing music and anecdotes, thoughts and jokes with a group of 'like' minded individuals. 2 I didn't anticipate this would be such a hard pill to swallow, considering that I wasn't sharing that many updates in the weeks leading up to my 'digital suicide'. But there's no disputing the fact that I'm suffering at the moment. Apparently, I don't write solely for my own enjoyment. Don't get me wrong: I'm no stranger to the fact that social media is a huge catalyst for a person's ego. And mine is jonesing for some thumbs up from the digital crowd.
It's utterly disappointing. Off course, I'm not caving in, but the fact that I'm really actually suffering from Facebook-withdrawal... what a silly thing! Not to mention the grave implications this puts on Facebook. More than ever, I see the danger of getting trapped inside social media's web. Thankfully, it has only added to my perseverance.
So what's the conclusion thus far?
1. I need to face my own ego, obviously. I need to be able to create meaning in what I do outside of 'the other'.
2. I need to be more creative when it comes to social interactions. In the end, real-life interactions will always trump whatever social media will throw at you, despite the extra effort.
3. I need to keep my long-term goals in mind. Get ahead with my education; spend more quality time with the missus; improve relationships with the people you hold dearest; be a more productive person in general. That's what I'm out to achieve. Maintenance of aim is always a difficult thing, but achieving one's goals is the ultimate pay off; only then can one decide the worth of one's sacrifices.
1 I should point out here that Facebook keeps your profile on file indefinitely, while Twitter erases your profile after four weeks. Especially in the case of FB, it's devious. Your 'old social life' is only a mouseclick away. That's how to get you.
2 In case you were wondering: Yes, I'm coining that.
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